Cultural differences

The scenario is a man accidently tearing a girl's miniskirt is a busy public place.  Here are various culturally different responses ]

Tokyo - The lady bowed, and said: “The quality of the skirt is not all that good." And then out a pin, put the skirt back together.

New York - The lady pulled out a name card, gave it to him and said: "This is my lawyer's card. He will contact you about a sexual harassment suit"

Paris - The lady said with a smile: "If you do not mind, a red rose can represent your apology." The French man bought her a rose, then they went to a bar, and lastly, they went to a small hotel.

London - The lady covered the torn spot, then said with a blush on her face: "Do you mind taking me home sir? I live very close..." The English man took his jacket off, put on her shoulders; call a cab, then took her home safely.

China - The young lady slapped the guy, then: "You sex maniac. Dare to take advantage of me, I will send you to the labour camp..."

Taiwan - The girl smiled and said: "We have not come up with a price yet, and you are going to inspect the merchandise?"

Hong Kong - The girl screamed: "XXX your XXX, you think I am the cheap item on the street? Watch out, I will find someone to pierce your skin."

Korea - The girl gave him a kick, then said: "Don't you know that I am a second degree black belt in Tai Kwan Dao."

Thailand - The girl said with a gesture: "No worries honey, we are all men."

Psalm of Julia ..........A new Australian version of Psalm 23.

FIRST BOOK OF AUSTRALIAN GOVERNMENT

Prime Minister Julia is the shepherd I did not want.
She leadeth me beside the still factories.
She restoreth my faith in the Liberal party.
She guideth me in the path of unemployment for her party's sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the bread line,
I shall fear no hunger for her bailouts are with me.
She has annointed my income with taxes,
My expenses runneth over.
Surely, poverty and hard living will follow me all the days of my life.
And I will live in a rented home forever.
I am glad I am Australian.
I am glad that I am free.
But I wish I was a big dog
And Julia was a tree.
  

AMEN BROTHER!!

Why has my penis turned Orange?

A guy goes to a doctor "Doc, you've got to help me. My penis is orange."

The doctor asks the guy to drop his pants and after a his investigation, says, "This is strange. Sometimes things like this are caused by stress"

Probing more the Doc asks, "How are things going at work?"

I was fired six weeks ago. The boss was an asshole, I worked unpaid overtime every week and I had no say in anything. But I found a new job a last week where set my own hours, plus  the pay is double before and the boss is a great guy."

That all sounds Ok says the doc , "So how's your home life?"

"Well, I got divorced eight months ago." For years, all I listened to was nag, nag, nag. God, am I glad to be rid of that old bitch."

The doc responds “Ok that all seems all is fine. So do you have any hobbies or a social life?"

"Not really. Most nights I sit home and watch porno flicks and munch on Cheetos".

http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20100318061245AAAh6Uk

Forgot my glasses ....

Yesterday, for something useful to do, my daughter suggested I go to the senior center and hang out.

I did and when I got home I told her I had joined a parachute club.

"Are you nuts? You're 75 and you're going to jump out of airplanes?"

I proudly showed her that I even got a membership card.

"Dad, where are your glasses! This is a membership to a Prostitute Club, not a Parachute Club!" and even worse, its for five jumps a week!

Its Life as a senior is not getting always easy.

End of an era

This month will see the end of daylight saving in the southern hemisphere the start of it in for our northern brothers and sisters.

Daylight saving bashers have become a thing of the past but not so the wise American India who still makes a good point.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When told the reason for daylight saving time the Old Indian said

“Only the government would believe that you can cut the top off a blanket and sew it back on the bottom and you have a longer blanket”