"Humour for all Occasions" is about friends sharing stories. Please enjoy & get more on "Learning About Business" at Performance Controller.com.

Friday, February 9, 2018

It's been a while Andrew. I heard from Andy you are doing OK 
Here is something to make you laugh ....................
A teacher was helping her third-grade students with a math problem. After choosing a student in particular, she recited the following story:
“Billy, there are three birds sitting on a telephone wire. A man with a gun shoots one of the birds. How many birds are left on the wire?”
The boy pauses. “None,” he replied thoughtfully.
“No, no, no. Let’s try again, maybe you didn’t hear me correctly,” the teacher says patiently. She holds up three fingers.
“There are three birds sitting on a wire. A man with a gun shoots one,” she puts down one finger, “how many birds are left on the wire?”
“None,” the boy says with authority.
The teacher sighs. “Tell me how you came up with that.”
“It’s simple,” says the boy, “after the man shot one bird, the noise from the gun scared the other two away.” “Well,” she says, “that’s not technically correct, but I like the way you think.”

“Thanks,” chimes the boy, “now let me ask you a question.”
“Okay,” she said guardedly.
“There are three women sitting on a bench eating popsicles.  One woman is licking the popsicle, one woman is biting the popsicle, and one is sucking the popsicle. Which one is married?” he asked innocently.
The teacher looked at the boy’s angelic face and writhed in agony, turning three shades of red.
“C’mon,” the boy said impatiently, “which one is it, the one licking the popsicle, the one biting it, or the one sucking it?
Which one is married?”
“Well, uh,” she gulped and in a barely audible whisper replied,
“the one who’s sucking?”
“Naw,” he says with surprise, “the one with the wedding ring.
But I like the way you think.”

Thursday, June 29, 2017

Here's Something Special at Sportsman


A new once a month FUN 8 ball scotch doubles tournament Starts this Thursday June 29 at Sportsman. 

Players will be in three bands being ,3 handicap and below, 4 handicap and 5 handicap. 

Players on a handicap of 3 cannot be drawn with other players on 3. Same for players on a 5. 

First player to 15 points gets a brand new Predator Poison cue. 

Register with TT or Tor. 

*All prize money is paid out on the night

*99 baht drinks specials and *Free BBQ'  

 Everyone welcome 

This flyer has more detail 

Tuesday, January 3, 2017

Here is a Tough One to Granddads

Granda, when you were a kid, were you keen to grow up so you could do anything you wanted?
Yes.I was!
So, how did that woking out for you?

Tuesday, September 6, 2016

Best Quote of Any Era

 Cicero, in 55 BC said 

"The Budget should be balanced, the Treasury should be refilled, public debt should be reduced,the arrogance of officialdom should be tempered and controlled, and the assistance to foreign lands should be curtailed, lest Rome will become bankrupt. People must again learn to work instead of living on public assistance."

Evidently we've learned bugger all in 2,071 years.