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Saturday, April 17, 2010

Court Case

 

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Defense Attorney:

Will you please state your age?
Old Lady:

I am 94 years old.
Defense Attorney:

Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened the night of April 1st?
Old Lady:

There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front porch on a warm spring evening,  
when a young man comes creeping up on the porch and sat down beside me.
Defense Attorney:

Did you know him?
Old Lady:

No, but he sure was friendly.
Defense Attorney:

What happened after he sat down?
Old Lady:

He started to rub my thigh.
Defense Attorney:

Did you stop him?
Old Lady:

No, I didn't stop him.
Defense Attorney:

Why not?
Little Old Lady:

It felt good. Nobody had done that since my Albert died some 30 years ago.
Defense Attorney:

What happened next?
Old Lady:

He began to rub all over of my body.
Defense Attorney:

Did you stop him then?
Old Lady:

No, I did not stop him.
Defense Attorney:

Why not?
Old Lady:

His rubbing made me feel all alive and excited. I haven't felt that good in years!
Defense Attorney:

What happened next?
Old Lady:

Well, by then, I was feeling so 'spicy' that I just laid down and told him
'Take me, young man. Take me now!'
Defense Attorney:

Did he take you?
Old Lady:

Hell, no! He just yelled, ' April Fool!' And that's when I shot him, the little bastard!