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Wednesday, September 24, 2014

20 Dead Giveaways That Someone Is British.

1. Strong opinions about queuing. Also, calling it queuing.

2. They are polite to people they hate and insult the people they like.
3. Asking them if they are okay, and they say "yeah, can't complain".
4. They ask you and everyone else in the office how you like your tea, and never ask again as they'll remember it forever.
5. When they say "Cheers" as an expression of gratitude most of the time. Oh and the 'mate' that comes next.
6. They use "quid" instead of pounds.
7. Use of telly instead of TV.
8. Use of the word 'mug' without going on to reference some kind of drink.
9. Make a cup of tea. BUT, in this order: Tea bag in, then milk and finally hot water. If they are British they will squirm.
10. When you catch their eye in public, they'll pretend to be looking for somebody else in every other direction.
11. When I was in London some British folks told me you can spot a Brit because they wear black socks.
12. No matter where they are in the world, if you ask them where they are from, they will tell you the town or county, not the country.
13. Use of the word posh.
14. British people always use the expression "half 8" meaning 8:30.
15. Ask them about the weather. It’s their go-to small talk.
16. They greet people by asking if they're alright. And the answer to "Alright?" is "Alright?"
17. Affectionate hate for the French out of a sense of national obligation.
18. They pronounce "twat" as though it rhymes with ‘hat’ or ‘cat.’
19. They are reserved and think anything done with enthusiasm is "cringey" or "cringeworthy".
20. The two questions they ask to taxi drivers are: "Been busy?" "What time you on till?"