Yesterday I searched the web with no success for some good relevant humour about the current economic woes. As many watch their businesses, life savings, pension and super funds disappear, behind the scenes the finance fairy of good times, for so long, is now using a salami slicer daily to carve massive value off share markets around the world. It seems soon there will be nothing left.
It also seems a good joke to get the belly laughing is a better remedy than putting a gun to the head to cure the headache.
Coming tho the rescue and fitting is a this very humorous entry, from Trish Stevens, It is about changing terms to reflect this current state of world events as at October 2008.
- CEO --Chief Embezzlement Officer.
- CFO-- Corporate Fraud Officer.
- BULL MARKET -- A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.
- BEAR MARKET -- A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.
- VALUE INVESTING -- The art of buying low and selling lower.
- P/E RATIO -- The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.
- BROKER -- What my broker has made me.
- STANDARD & POOR -- Your life in a nutshell.
- STOCK ANALYST -- Idiot who just downgraded your stock.
- STOCK SPLIT -- When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves.
- FINANCIAL PLANNER -- A guy whose phone has been disconnected.
- MARKET CORRECTION -- The day after you buy stocks.
- CASH FLOW-- The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.
- YAHOO -- What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share.
- WINDOWS -- What you jump out of when you're the sucker who bought Yahoo @ $240 per share.
- INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR -- Past year investor who's now locked up in a nuthouse.
- PROFIT -- An archaic word no longer in use
Perhaps we also need something to fix things now, interesting Trish's first contribution that got all this blog started nearly 2 years ago. http://hfao.blogspot.com/2006_12_01_archive.html