Release of the Wedding Doves

This is nice !!!
They walked out onto the steps of the Church, after a delightful wedding ceremony,with a hundred friends now gathered around.
Following a tradition, the Bride and Groom stand happily shoulder to shoulder each holding a beautiful white Dove.
Everyone is eager, as the Photographer gives the signal to open their hands together and release the Doves toward the sky.
The camera flashes .... and the moment is captured for eternity!!
This symbol of eternal love brings tears to the faces of everyone present!
 
 
 
Scroll down.........................
 
 
 
 

Costs: Wedding Gown $5,500. Photographer $2,000. Vintage Rolls Rent $1,000.
Having 'the twins' pop out and say 'CHEESE' in front of family and friends .. PRICELESS!!

Startling News - Speaking of sex

On average, a Canadian man will have sex two to three times a week;  whereas a Japanese man will have sex only one or two times a year.

This is upsetting news to me, as I had no idea I was Japanese.

Speaking of sex, did you hear that during sex you burn off as many calories as running 8 miles? 

Who the hell runs 8 miles in 15 seconds?

Book Report

Students at a local school were assigned to read 2 books, 'Titanic' and 'My Life' by Bill Clinton. One student turned in the following book report, with the proposition that they were nearly identical stories! His cool professor gave him an A+ for this report: Titanic: Cost - $29.99 Clinton: Cost - $29.99 Titanic: Over 3 hours to read Clinton: Over 3 hours to read Titanic: The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe. Clinton: The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe. Titanic: Jack is a starving artist. Clinton: Bill is a bullshit artist. Titanic: In one scene, Jack enjoys a good cigar. Clinton: Ditto for Bill Titanic: During the ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined. Clinton: Ditto for Monica. Titanic: Jack teaches Rose to spit. Clinton: Let's not go there. Titanic:  Rose gets to keep her jewellery. Clinton: Monica is forced to return her gifts. Titanic:  Rose remembers Jack for the rest of her life. Clinton: Clinton doesn't remember anything. Titanic:  Rose goes down on a vessel full of seamen. Clinton: Monica.. Ooh, let's not go there, either. Titanic:  Jack surrenders to an icy death. Clinton: Bill goes home to Hillary - basically the same thing.

An American tourist in London

An American tourist in London decides to skip his tour group and explore the city on his own. As he wanders around, he occasionally stops at the quaint pubs to soak up the local culture.

After a while, he finds himself in a very nice neighborhood of stately residences with no pubs, no stores, no restaurants, and worst of all NO PUBLIC RESTROOMS.

He  really has to go after all those Guinness’s, so he finds a narrow alley, that is quite private with high walls surrounding the adjacent buildings .

As he is unzipping, he is tapped on the shoulder by a London police officer, who says, "I say, sir, you simply cannot do that here."

"I'm very sorry, officer, I just can't find a public restroom and I really, really have to go."

“Just follow me". says the policeman who leads the American nearby delivery gate just down the alley  .

Opening the door the policeman points, "In there Sir ,anywhere you like."

The fellow finds himself in the most beautiful garden with  manicured lawns, statuary, fountains, sculptured hedges, and huge beds of gorgeous flowers, all in perfect bloom.

He relieves himself and then goes back through the gate, and see the police officer still there, "That was really decent of you... is that what you call English hospitality?"

"No sir...", replied the officer, "...that is what we call the French Embassy."

Sex Malpractice Law Suit

A recent article in the Dominion Post reported that  Nancy Pelosi has  sued Wellington Hospital, saying that after her husband  had surgery there, he  lost all interest in sex.
A hospital  spokesman replied: "Your husband was admitted for cataract surgery. All  we did was correct his  eyesight.