"Humour for all Occasions" is about friends sharing stories. Please enjoy & get more on "Learning About Business" at Performance Controller.com.

Monday, April 5, 2010

Motorcycle Ghost

A guy rigged a remote controlled motorbike with a loudspeaker and a skeleton driving the bike.

He hides across the street from a walled cemetery and when people walk by it at night, the skeleton rides up on his motor bike and . . . 

This should give your heart a jump start.  Enjoy!!

Saturday, April 3, 2010

A Very Short Story

image Man driving down road. 


Woman driving up same road. 

They pass each other. 

The woman yells out the window, PIG! 

Man yells out window, BITCH!

Man rounds the next curve. 

Man crashes into a HUGE PIG in middle of road and dies. 

Moral For the Day:

If men would just listen.

Friday, April 2, 2010

Driving to show

If you thought you could drive well take a look at this and then maybe think again.

Retiring Postman

image It was Postman Pat's last day on the job after 35 years of
carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same villages and
towns.


When he arrived at the first house on his route, he was greeted
by the whole family there, who all hugged and congratulated him and
sent him on his way with a cheque for $50.


At the second house they presented him an 18-carat gold watch.


The folks at the third house handed him a bottle of 15-year old
Scotch whisky.


At the fourth house he was met at the door by a dumb blonde in
her lingerie. She took him by the arm and led him up the stairs to
the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate love
he had ever experienced. When they went downstairs, the blonde fixed
him a full English breakfast: Bacon, Eggs, Sausage & Tomato with freshly
squeezed orange juice. As she was pouring him a cup of steaming coffee,
he noticed a $5 note sticking out from under the cup.


'All this was just too wonderful for words,' he said, 'but
what's the five dollars for?'


'Well,' said the dumb blonde, 'Last night, I told my husband
that today would be your last day and that we should do something special
for you'. 'I asked him what I should give you'.


He said, 'F**k him. Give him a fiver.'
She smiled shyly and said, 'The breakfast was my idea.'

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Mint Flavoured Birth Control Pill:

The Cadbury's Candy Co. And Merck Drug Co. Have combined to market the new Mint flavored birth control pill that women may take immediately before sex.

The Pill will be distributed by the large major drug store chains and Wal-Mart's Pharmacies.

They're going to be called...."Pre-dick-a-mints!"