The Hypnotist

A woman comes home and tells her husband, 'Remember those headaches I've been having all these years?  Well, they're gone'.

'No more  headaches?' the husband asks, 'What happened?'
His wife  replies, 'Margie referred me to a hypnotist and he told me to stand in  front of a mirror, Stare at myself and repeat,

' I do not have a headache '
' I do not have a headache '
' I do not have a headache '

And it  worked! The headaches are gone.

That is  wonderful proclaims the husband.

His wife then  says, 'You know, you haven't been exactly a ball of fire in the bedroom these last few years, why don't you go see the hypnotist and see if he can do anything for that? 'Reluctantly, the husband agrees to try it. Following his appointment, the husband comes home, rips off his clothes, picks up his wife and carries her into the bedroom.. He puts her on the bed and says,  'Don't move, I'll be right back.'

He goes into  the bathroom and comes back a few minutes later and jumps into bed and  makes passionate love to his wife like never before.

His wife says, 'WOW! - that was wonderful!'

The husband says, 'Don't  move! I will be right back.'
He goes back into the bathroom, comes back and
round two was even better than the first time.

The wife  sits up and her head is spinning
'OH MY GOD' She proclaims.

Her  husband again says, 'Don't move, I'll be right back.'
With that, he  goes back in the bathroom.

This time, his wife quietly follows him  and there in the bathroom, she sees him standing at the mirror and  saying,

'She's not my wife'
'She's not my wife'
'She's not my wife'
'She's not my wife'

........His funeral service will be  held on Saturday.