'That's 100 lbs. Of dynamite, Baby

The body builder takes off his shirt And the blonde says, "What a Great chest you have!' He tells her, 'That's 100 lbs. Of dynamite, Baby.' He takes off his pants and the blonde says,' "What massive calves you have!' The body builder tells her, 'That's 100 lbs. Of dynamite, Baby.' He then removes his underwear and The blonde goes running out of the Apartment screaming in fear. The body builder puts his clothes Back on and chases after her. He catches up to her and asks why She ran out of the apartment like that. The blonde replies, 'I was afraid to be around all that dynamite  After I saw how short the fuse was!'

JOKE OF THE YEAR

Two women were sitting
quietly together,  
minding their own business...

Walking Eagle

President BARACK  OBAMA was invited to address a major gathering of the American  Indian Nation in upstate New York .

He spoke for almost an hour about his plans for increasing every Native American's present standard of living. He referred to his time as a U.S. Senator and how he had voted for every Native American issue that came to the floor of the Senate.
Although President Obama was vague about the details of his plans, he seemed most enthusiastic and spoke eloquently about his ideas for helping his "red sisters and brothers."
At the conclusion of his speech, the Tribes presented Obama with a plaque inscribed with his new Indian name, "Walking Eagle." The proud President then departed in his motorcade to a fundraiser, waving to the crowds.
A news reporter later asked the group of chiefs how they came to select the new name they had given to the President.
They explained that "Walking Eagle" is the name given to a bird so full of shit it can no longer fly.

Irish Bride Virginity Test

The Irish always have great solutions ..

Wrong answer!

 And it all started so innocently...

WIFE: What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?

HUSBAND: Definitely not!

WIFE:Why not - don't you like being married?

HUSBAND: Of course I do.

WIFE: Then why wouldn't you remarry?

HUSBAND: Okay, I'd get married again.

WIFE:You would? (With a hurtful look on her face).

HUSBAND: (Makes audible groan).

WIFE: Would you live in our house?

HUSBAND: Sure, it's a great house.

WIFE: Would you sleep with her in our bed?

HUSBAND: Where else would we sleep?

WIFE:Would you let her drive my car?

HUSBAND: Probably, it is almost new.

WIFE: Would you replace my pictures with hers?

HUSBAND: That would seem like the proper thing.

WIFE: Would she use my golf clubs?

HUSBAND: No, she's left-handed.

WIFE: - silence –

HUSBAND: F**k ...