Lexophiliats walk among us

Did you know a  Lexophilia  is a word (yes you can add it to your dictionary)

It is used to describe those of us who love twisting words,

such as

"I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.  OR

“To write with a broken pencil is pointless ."

A competition to find the the best lexophiles is held every year in an undisclosed location. Here are this year's finalist submissions.

• A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.
• When the smog lifts in Los Angeles U.C.L.A.
• The batteries were given out free of charge.
• A will is a dead giveaway
• With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.
• A boiled egg is hard to beat.
• A plateau is a high form of flattery.
• Did you hear about the fellow whose entire left side was cut off? He's all right now.
• A bicycle can't stand alone; it's just two tired.
• When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.
• Acupuncture is a jab well done. That's the point of it.

And the winner of the twisted crop:

              "The Local Area Network in Australia is “The LAN down under”.