The Cremated Husband

 

Martha lost her husband three weeks ago. She had him cremated and  brought his ashes home and kept them on the end table.
The other day she picked up the urn  and went out to the patio. She sat down at the patio table and poured him out on the table.
She sat there looking at the ashes while tracing her fingers in them. After a few minutes she started talking to the ashes.
"Herman, you know that dishwasher you promised me?  I bought it with the insurance money!"
She paused for a minute tracing her fingers in  the ashes then said, "Herman, remember that car you  promised me? Well, I also bought it with the insurance money!"
Again, she paused for a few minutes  and while tracing her fingers in the ashes she said,  "Herman, that diamond ring you promised me? Bought it too, with the insurance money!"
Finally, still tracing her fingers in the ashes, She said, "Herman, remember that blow job I promised you? Here it comes!!!"