Dear Dad

A father passing by his daughter's bedroom was astonished to see that her bed was nicely made and everything was picked up.

Then he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to "Dad," With the worst premonition he opened the envelope with trembling hands and read the letter.


Dear Dad,


It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you.


I had to elope with my new boyfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.


I have been finding real passion with Carlos and he is so nice, but I knew you would not approve of him because of all his piercing, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that he is much older than I am, but it's not only the passion…Dad, I am pregnant.


Carlos said that we will be very happy. He owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.


Carlos has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy.


In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so that Carlos can get better. He deserves it.


Don't worry Dad I know I'm only 15, but I know how to take care of myself.


Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren.


Love,

Your daughter
Melissa


PS. Dad, none of the above is true.
I'm over at Eva's house.
I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the report card that's in my center desk drawer.


I love you.


Call me when it's safe to come home.